Inside the Mind of a Nathan

Well, I am about to begin a script for a Rudolph Strategies video. Largely, I have been preparing: collecting my thoughts, getting input, and learning a few small skills. Partially, I have been avoiding it. Last night as I was tinkering around in my brain, I made up a little guideline: if you find that you've talked about doing a thing more than you've actually worked on the thing, it's time to attempt it — whatever stage it may be.

Well, snap, crackle, pop. Now is probably not the time to be starting a post, but I felt compelled. Truly, I shall not say anything extraordinary. Still, the world can sometimes seem so cruel and dark, but, sometimes, it can seem so full of potential, so full of healing.

We also have the prophetic message …, and you will do well to pay attention to it, as to a light shining in a dark place, until the day dawns and the morning star rises in your hearts. (2 Peter 1:19) Sometimes, Scripture is kinda dry and historical: "He did this. This guy did that. They attacked each other. They claimed this much cattle. He begat children. They begat more children." Sometimes, it's epic: "Until the day dawns and the morning star rises in your hearts."

Well, snap on a dog. It's amazing how much can change in so short a time. Obviously, there are seasons of change and seasons of stability. Still, it feels like my life has been roiling changes for the past many years. These past two years especially have been non-stop changes. I am a whole new creature like seven times over. I interact with others differently; I have different priorities; I have different goals; I have different fears; I have different confidence; I have different skills; I even have different music tastes!

There's nothing quite like it. Family: the place where you know you can be weird. The place where there are rough edges and abrasive conversations but always warmth and welcoming.

I'm not too focused right now. I just trudged through a lot of informational videos/slideshows for substitute teaching. One of the segments was 107  slides of legal jargon. The questions at the end didn't even have anything to do with all the blabbing! Ridiculousness.

I still don't want to write, but I don't feel death sick anymore, just a bit of a cold. I think it's wonderful to see the transition from <I don't feel like writing because I'm a whiny, cotton-headed ninny-muggins> to <I would like to write, but the snot has taken over my brain>.

Nathan : I don't want to write. Nathan : A little bit every day. N : Dude, I've been sick. The only thing coming out of my brain is snot. N : A little bit every day.

I haven't properly written in over a week! Shameful! I wrote some emails — even a few creative ones — but it's never quite enough. Anywho, Rudolph Strategies is coming along slowly but surely. I've spent the last few weeks discovering websites where I can create some kind of professional profile: thumbtack.com  for example. I've connected with a few people — but no jobs yet.