None of It

Sometimes, I feel indomitable. Sometimes, I feel so weak. Sometimes, I feel like I'm not supposed to trust God. I am reminded of Isaiah 30:15 "This is what the Sovereign Lord, the Holy One of Israel, says: 'In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength, but you would have none of it.' "

"But you would have none of it."

I want all of it! I want to repent and rest! I want to be quieted and trusting!

I have plenty of my own fears — true enough — but fearing seems so popular in the Christian world. On Facebook, I read through a list of sins that are becoming acceptable in the church. Before I even clicked, "gossip!" popped into my mind. It was on the list.

Fearing was also on the list. My goodness! Long story short, I don't want to fear. I want to repent and be renewed. I want to live in freedom and trust. I want to throw myself through the air like a dumb child knowing that God will either catch me or let me learn a mild lesson. We forget. I forget that our God is The Good Father. Sometimes, we gotta let our kids learn hard lessons — true enough. More often than not, however, we're just dumb, playing morons. There's no severe lesson to learn; there's just this unlimited world of discovery made for God's glory and for our enjoyment!

Sheesh.

In other news, I'm way behind with Automated Income Machine — at least according to the given schedule — but that's just my point: God anoints us with the likeness of His son. Now, all we have is this in-progress holiness adventure!

I think one thing that's killing us is the idea that we need to be comfortable, we need to be in control. We need to have food when we want it — and of course cooked how we want it. We need to have internet access. We need to have new clothing. We need to know that we could save ourselves if an accident happened.

Daily bread, man. Daily bread. What happened to daily bread? Living on the edge of every morning? Stepping into the renewed grace and mercy of God each day? What happened to realizing we're just a bunch of dumb kids running around in God's love?

I'm a dumb kid! I mean, I know a bunch of thingies, but I'm just this kid that's footling about. I'm just this halfwitted goober who's learning how good God really is. Each time I step closer to Him, the world opens up more! Each time I try to control my life, the boundaries slink in, the colors dim, and joys are less joyful.

But! But. But each time I draw into His Word and beg for His presence, I am drawn open and filled with crazy new life.

And that's it! That's all we need on this ridiculous planet: to be like Christ and, by His death and resurrection, to be drawn into God's unstoppable love.

In Christ! That is where we are supposed to be! That's the whole world! The whole story!

That's what I want. I want all of it.